OFF: This one reminded me on DBZ power levels. The classic one: Frieza (basic form) 530,000.
semi-ON: we can compare each pipsqueaks with football players based on their performance, loyalty to teams, fair play, etc. Suggestions: Bonzai Joe = Alessandro Del Piero, Zak McKracken = Ryan Giggs. Feel free to associate CTG with any applicants from "Jerks on the football field" topic (maybe Ibrahimovic or Balotelli).
ON: I need a team in 2013. Any volunteers? Vacant seats?